What Country Do You Live In? Berkeley!

We've been trying to teach Elliot some rudimentary geography. That includes the name of our street, our town, our state and our country.

I guess it's a lot to absorb for a 3-year-old because sometimes when I ask what country he lives in, he'll say, "Berkeley."

At first I would correct him, but now I wonder if he's just absorbing the local sentiment.

"Socialist Democratic Republic of Berkeley" — sign on truck selling rustic birdhouses.

Most people in Berkeley do live in their own country.

BuboBlog Reviews 'Chronicle'

The "found-footage" genre  has become a popular form of cinema, with about 60 feature films using the technique so far. Thirteen years after "The Blair Witch Project," you could argue that stitching a movie together out of snippets of amateur video is getting pretty tired — and yet, there's a reason it works.

For one, it's a great way to blunt cliches. If a character gains super powers and leaps into the air, that's a pretty tired premise. But if he's shown flying away in an unsteady homemade video, it adds a bit of freshness and verisimilitude.

"Chronicle" makes the most of the found-footage approach, and stakes a claim beside "Cloverfield" and "District 9" as a standard bearer for the genre. I didn't find it quite as poignant as either of those films, but "Chronicle" explored enough new ground to show why these sorts of movies are still worth making.

The film features a trio of teens who gain the power of telekinesis after discovering a mysterious cavern. (Yes, this sounds preposterous, but when you see it in fuzzy video clips, you buy it.) The scenario gives the characters the ability to levitate the camera, so they don't have to hold it while they film everything. This makes it seem slightly less ludicrous that they're able to record all their actions — compared with, say, "Cloverfield."

Most of the film depicts the teens coming to grips with their new-found power. After a period of fun and games, one of the youths turns to darker activities, setting the stage for a mayhem-filled finale. The New Yorker's David Denby took issue with the film's third act, saying it was too conventional and grim in its approach. But it's hard to imagine how else "Chronicle" could have proceeded. It's been said that every movie has the same theme — "careful what you wish for" — and not delving into that territory would have made the picture much less satisfying.

In fact, when the character does go bad, the movie has earned it. His descent seems inevitable, based on his troubled home life and the exhilaration of his seemingly limitless powers.

"Chronicle" should be commended for creating a super villain that is entirely plausible and sympathetic. How many movies accomplish that, regardless of their video quality?

BuboBlog Rating: 3 asterisks (out of 4)

'Poop! (There It Is)'

Folks, what can I say? I've let you down.

I pride this blog on being a top-quality source of information on both baby trends and 1990s hip-hop. And yet, it's taken me a year to get wind of the Luvs "Poop There It Is" commercial? (In 2011, it was named the worst commercial of the year.) I blame my slowness on the fact that we only watch Netflix and Hulu these days.

In case you've missed it too, the ad features three cartoon babies competing to fill their diapers with feces. "American Idol"-style judges then rate the performances.



All the while, we hear "Poop! (There It Is)" — a playful twist on "Whoomp! (There It Is)," the 1993 hit from Tag Team. Question: Is this better or worse than "Baby Got Backpack"?

You'll recall there was a song called "Whoot, There It Is" from 95 South that also charted in 1993. Having two nearly identical songs become popular at the same time was an odd turn of events that only seems odder in retrospect.

But perhaps if Luvs wants to use the 95 South track in a follow-up ad, it can be called "Toot, There It Is."

As always, I provide my consulting services free of charge.

'STOP Driving Shrooms'?

As I've documented extensively, our neighborhood in Berkeley appears to have one of the highest rates of stop-sign defacement in the United States (if not the world).

Here's one where it doesn't seem like a lot of care/thought went into it. Someone took a "STOP Driving" sign and scrawled "shrooms" beneath it.

You can barely make out the word "shrooms," and it's hard to figure out what that has to do with driving.

It's almost as if the person were mentally incapacitated when they wrote this.

Is 'Downton Abbey' a Good Source of Baby Names?

People who study baby names frequently cite the "100-year rule" — the notion that names become popular in century-long cycles.

That makes me wonder if "Downton Abbey" isn't a good source for would-be parents. After all, the show is set in 1912 (at the outset of the two-season series). So it should be chockfull of naming goodness.

Now, it's not a perfect source of 100-year monikers. The older characters would have names that were popular much earlier.

And you're relying on the show's writers to have picked true names from that era (given the anachronisms in dialogue, that's no sure thing).

But I find many of the names very appealing. I'm really hoping there's a spate of Lavinias born this year. C'mon, people, make that happen.

Here's a list of the names, along with when they peaked in popularity (in America, not Britain).

THE NAMES OF DOWNTON
Anna (1800s)
Anthony (2007-2008)
Charles/Charlie (1800s)
Cora (1800s)
Daisy (1800s)
Edith (1800s)
Ethel (1890s)
Evelyn (1910-1920s)
Frederick/Freddie (1800s)
George (1800s)
Gwen (1950s)
Henry (1800s)
Isobel/Isabel (2003)
Jane (1940s)
John (1800s-1910s)
Joseph (1910s)
Lavinia (1800s)
Mary (1800s-1950s)
Matthew (1980s-1990s)
Richard (1930s-1940s)
Robert (1920s-1930s)
Rosamund/Rosa (1800s)
Sarah (1980s-1990s)
Sybil (1920s)
Thomas (1940s-1950s)
Vera (1910s)
Violet (1910s)
William (1800s-1910s)

As you can see, only a few of these are true 100-year names. The ones that peaked either before or during the 1910s are: Anna, Charlie, Cora, Daisy, Edith, Ethel, Evelyn, Freddie, George, Henry, John, Joseph, Lavinia, Rosamund, Vera, Violet and William.

Good choices, all.

Movie Posters Grouped by Theme

I recently came across a clever French blog (no, not Le BuboBlog, which has no affiliation with this one). It's a site that groups together movie posters by theme; say, ones that feature a park bench or people wearing sunglasses.

You often hear talk about how formulaic movie trailers are (epitomized by this generic film preview). This French guy's site really demonstrates how formulaic posters are as well.

So what appeals to filmgoers?

Apparently they like to see movies about people with text over their blindfolds...

...or dark figures with their backs to the audience...

...or close-ups of eyeballs...

...or women in red dresses.

You can see many more examples here. (And thanks for the tip, BuboBlog Portola Valley correspondent Jon.)

Another Cautionary Tale About Child Labor

I've written before about the pitfalls of relying on child labor.

Well, this weekend Elliot had to make almost 20 valentines — enough for everyone in his preschool class.

He lost interest after a few of them and began squeezing glue into the crayon box.

So I had to make most of the valentines myself.

Fortunately, I have the arts-and-crafts skills of a 3-year-old, so no one will notice the difference.

When Karaoke Happens Behind Closed Doors

Last night we went with some friends to the Jaguar Karaoke lounge in Oakland's Temescal neighborhood. (We were enticed by its slogan, "Let's sing, dance, and crazy!!")

It's one of those private-room karaoke places — something I haven't experienced before. If I'm going to embarrass myself, I'd usually rather do it in front of a crowd.

Mostly I was struck by how much it resembled a brothel.

When you arrive, the "madam" ushers you through hallways painted red until you arrive at a numbered room. Along the way, you hear muffled screeching from behind the other doors. The whole thing feels vaguely shameful. (Note: I haven't been to a real brothel, but I have watched "Red Shoe Diaries.") 

There's no alcohol, which is a drawback versus regular karaoke bars. But they do supply you with your own tambourine. (For when you're ready to really "crazy.") 

In the end, we had a great time. And it's probably for the best that my singing "More Than Words" happens within an isolation chamber.

This tribute to Whitney Houston also will probably not be making tonight's Grammys retrospective.

Side note: It doesn't really add to the poignancy of her music when the background video is of Korean guys cleaning a sailboat.

The Living Water Tower

One thing you realize when you have kids: Role reversals can take place very quickly.

When we first moved to Berkeley, I enjoyed pointing out the water tower to Elliot. My reasoning was, water towers are fairly unusual in modern-day society, and the fact that we have a prominent one in southwest Berkeley is exciting.

The thing is, when you're 2 or 3 years old, EVERYTHING is unusual. And so, young kids have very different ideas about what's exciting.

As it turned out, Elliot got it in his head that his dad was very interested in water towers. After that, whenever he saw one he would say, "We should show that to Daddy. He likes those."

Then suddenly I had to pretend like *I* was the one excited about water towers.

That said, I am very excited about this "living" water tower in Minneapolis.

It uses a projector to make it seem like it's alive. Pretty cool.

If we're ever driving though Minneapolis, I will point this out to anyone who will listen.

A Marshmallow Cannon in the White House

I've discussed marshmallow guns before, specifically the arsenal available from the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog.Well, this week a kid brought a marshmallow cannon to the White House to demonstrate it to President Obama.

Fortunately, it wasn't this child.

An eighth-grader from Phoenix showed off a homemade gun that can shoot marshmallows up to 75 feet. In this video, the president insists on seeing it in action.

"The Secret Service isn't happy about this," Obama says.

'Taxiderm the Rich'

I spotted this sign in the window of a house on McGee Avenue in Berkeley.

I can only hope they let the rich die of natural causes first.

I Somehow Doubt This Is a Licensed Emergency Vehicle

Over the weekend we discovered flyers on our doorstep for something called the "Green Re-Leaf Delivery Service."

At first I thought it might be some kind of eco-friendly gardening service, but upon closer inspection, I realized it was offering marijuana delivery. Welcome to Berkeley.

Have we really reached the point where ordering marijuana is as easy as getting a pizza? (Of course, you'll end up ordering a pizza after the marijuana anyway, so everyone wins.)

It's a glossy, professional-looking flyer — with far better production values than most of the delivery restaurants in our area offer. On the reverse side it says if you present the flyer to the driver, he'll give you a free joint.

But is the guy really going to pull up in this vehicle? And what sort of emergency would require him to use the siren? ("Hello, Green Re-Leaf? We just put on 'The Big Lebowski' — I need you here STAT!")

Eric Holder is SO going to bust this operation.

How Old Is a Grown-Up?

"I'm almost a grown-up, Daddy."

"Oh, really? How old is a grown-up?"

"Ten."

"Ten? What kind of things can you do when you're ten?"

"Drive a car."

"Is that right?"

"Yes, I'm going to be a really big racetrack driver."

Terrifying Hexbug Colony

I thought we had a lot of Hexbugs in our house, but one of Elliot's friends has a much more impressive collection.

I can only imagine what these things will do when Skynet gets switched on.

A Different Sort of Day in San Francisco

Rob Delaney, a Los Angeles-based comedian with a huge following on Twitter, did a swing through San Francisco yesterday.

His experience (retold in tweets) provides a bit of a counterpoint to the tourism bureau's "A Day in the Life" video.

[Fact check: That is not the Golden Gate Bridge. -ed.]

Gay FranChina loves you right back, dude!

An Impossible Day in San Francisco

The tourism bureau ginned up this video depicting a day in the life of everyone's favorite city.



It's well-done, even if there's a suspicious lack of fog in much of the video. (And the ending gives the impression that everyone should drive home to Marin after visiting.)

It also would be impossible to literally do all of these things in one day. They show "The Nutcracker," which runs during December, and a Giants game, which couldn't be later than October.

Ceiling Solar System Contains No Pluto

I wonder if makers of glow-in-the-dark planets jumped at the chance to stop including Pluto — if only as a cost-saving measure.

For whatever reason, Elliot's solar-system set contains no Pluto, which was downgraded to a minor planet in 2006.

Actually, at the moment his solar system contains no Jupiter, Saturn or Neptune either. They fell to the floor a few days after we put them up there.

I tell Elliot, "Don't worry, Uranus is still stuck to the ceiling," and then giggle for a long time. Fortunately, he has no idea what I'm talking about.

The Lettuce Polarity Debate Continues!

You remember our discussion about whether the lettuce should go at the top or the bottom of a sandwich?

I expressed concern earlier that America is a lettuce-topping country, rather than a lettuce-bottoming country (the latter being my preference).

Well, I appear to have won a new ally in my campaign — and it's the most American of institutions: Parade magazine!

The main story this week is Super Bowl food, with the lettuce-bottmer shown here gracing the cover. There's even a subheadline that says, "What America Eats."

I'd say that decides it.

Can I Apply Hip-Hop Forensics to 'This Is How We Do It?'

An intrepid fellow named Donovan Strain (who apparently has some time on his hands) studied the lyrics of Ice Cube's "Good Day" and figured out that the events described only could have occurred on one day: Jan. 20, 1992.



From his blog, called Murk Avenue:

The ONLY day where:
Yo MTV Raps was on air
It was a clear and smogless day
Beepers were commercially sold
Lakers beat the SuperSonics
And Ice Cube had no events to attend was…
JANUARY 20 1992

Brilliant work! (However, did he check what day a blimp had a sign reading, "Ice Cube's a Pimp"?)

I'm excited about this new field of hip-hop forensics, so I decided to apply the same principles to "This Is How We Do It" by Montell Jordan.



Let's see:

It was Friday night (and he felt alright).
There was a party on the West Side.
Honeys in the street said, "Monty, yo we made it!"
It was summer (he refers to "summertime skirts").
Guys were wearing Kani (a fashion designer who became popular in the 1990s).
Gang bangers did not participate in a drive-by in South Central Los Angeles.
Montell had the money — specifically, hundred-dollar bills, y'all.
It was 1994 or later, since he relates an anecdote from that year (when he "made no money").
The song was recorded between late 1994 and early 1995, according to Wikipedia.
He mentioned meeting Paul Stewart, president of PMP Records. (Stewart introduced Montell to Russel Simmons, who helped launch his career.) 

Therefore, I can narrow it down to...
JUNE 24, 1994
JULY 1, 1994
JULY 8, 1994
JULY 15, 1994
JULY 22, 1994
JULY 29, 1994
AUGUST 5, 1994
AUGUST 12, 1994
AUGUST 19, 1994
AUGUST 26, 1994
SEPTEMBER 2, 1994
SEPTEMBER 9, 1994
SEPTEMBER 16, 1994

I think I need more information.

Berkeley Church Has Eerie Shadow of Cross

Forget about seeing the Virgin Mary on a grilled-cheese sandwich. There's a church in our neighborhood with an unintentional shadow of the cross.

I walked by this tonight on the way home from work. Because of the interplay of the streetlamps and the telephone pole, a near-perfect cross is projected onto the front of the Bethlehem Temple Church on California Street (at Derby).

If I were a more religious man, I might make something of this.

Man Freestyle Raps in Delivery Room

Given this blog's interest in babies and hip-hop, I'd be remiss not to post this video of a dad freestyle rapping to the beat of a fetal heart monitor.



When Kelly was pregnant with Elliot, I burned six CDs' worth of mixes for the delivery room. (In fact, we left late for the hospital so I could finish them. Priorities, people!)

Maybe I should have just improvised.

Being a Parent Means...

...looking for two socks, but finding one sock and a monster arm.

'Berkeley' Teen Program

So it's actually in Oakland?

(I guess I should look past the quotation marks and be grateful they spelled Berkeley correctly — no small feat.)

Are Wings Only for Girls?

Now that I'm raising a son and daughter, I've become more aware of the gender norms that society imposes on children. But here's one that took me by surprise.

Alice has a Pegasus puppet with pink wings. One of the neighborhood kids (a nearly 4-year-old girl) was over at our house and mentioned how the horse was obviously female.

"Because it's pink," I said.

"No, because it has wings."

"Wings are for girls?"

"Yes."

Apparently wings are in and of themselves a feminine trait. I suppose this is because most fairies depicted in books, television and movies are girls. (Disney in particular is a perpetrator of male-fairy discrimination.)

At what point did men lose the ability to rock a pair of wings without feeling like a chick?

I mean, Pegasus was a dude. Batman also has wings (I wish I had thought of this when conversing with the 4-year-old). And avenging angels are pretty manly.

Maybe it's not too late for men to reclaim the rights to wear wings. But we'll need to start convincing the younger generation.

'STOP Lying'

Someone is turning the "STOP flying" signs into "STOP lying" signs.

I guess I can get behind that movement. (And hey, maybe they're just cleaning up the graffiti one letter at a time.)

Meanwhile, this dilapidated billboard on Blake Street near San Pablo is just depressing.

"A mind is a terrible...waste"?

Maybe we should go fix this for Martin Luther King Day.

(Click here for the full series on defaced stop signs.)

Why Is This Happening to Me?

A birthday is fairly bewildering for a 1-year-old. I think Alice appreciated the attention, but she had no idea what the flaming-baked-good ritual was all about.

Alice's expression while we sing her happy birthday can only be described as "WTF?"

Infant Mysteriously Turns One Year of Age With No Warning

Alice had her first birthday yesterday — something that's still hard for me to believe.

A year ago, she was birthed under inauspicious circumstances. Now she's blazing her way through life as if she owns the place.

Happy birthday, Alice.

'Downton Abbeyoncé'

The Internet has spawned a number of great "mash-up" sites. I'm not sure this is one of them

UPDATE: When it comes to Beyoncé mash-ups, it's hard to imagine there's anything odder/more awesome than Sugarland doing a country version of "Irreplaceable."

'Mission Impossible: Crimson Hibiscus'

Someone has created a website for generating your own Beyoncé/Jay-Z baby name. (It appears to randomly pair the name of a color with a plant.)

I'm pretty sure this site is also being used to create the subtitle for the next Mission Impossible sequel.

'A Younger, Smarter, Faster Me'

Jay-Z and Beyoncé have stirred up some controversy by naming their baby girl Blue Ivy (hey, it beats Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop).

My favorite explanation (not verified) is that Blue Ivy is a human follow-up to Jay-Z's three "Blueprint" albums. Ivy or "IV" would be four in Roman numerals.

Mainly I just hope she's not named after Yankees blue.

In any case, it's hard to hate on Jay-Z's new musical tribute to his baby — if only because it's so heartfelt. He calls his daughter "a younger, smarter, faster me." (Sounds like someone I know.)



Here's to baby girls, whatever they're called.

'You Don't See Anything Funny About That Lightbulb?'

I was reading Elliot one of his library books (an Elephant & Piggie story), when I came across this picture.

I chuckled at Piggie getting an idea with a compact-fluorescent bulb. Then I realized there wasn't anything funny about it. That's what lightbulbs look like.

In fact, I'm not sure Elliot has ever seen an incandescent bulb in real life.  When I asked him if the bulb in the story looked funny, he studied it for a while and said no.

Movie Titles That State the Premise: Part 2

Slate recently decried the increase in film titles that flatly state what the movie is about. I'm not sure this is really a problem, but it does seem like the new film "Man on a Ledge" would be an offender. If you haven't seen the trailer, it's about, well, a man on a ledge.

I suppose "Clash of the Titans" should have gotten credit for a title that didn't at all describe what it was about — since there were no titans in the film. Kudos!

A sequel called "Wrath of the Titans" is coming out in March. And, based on the cast list, it appears to have no titans either.

At least they're sticking to their guns on this.

On Second Thought...

There actually might be something working against the "twenty twelve" pronunciation: the Mayan prophecy.

The year 2012 is now so closely linked with the Mayan calendar, and "twenty twelve" doesn't sound very ancient and/or prophetic. "Two thousand twelve" has the weight of history.

Don't believe me? The movie "2012" used the "two thousand twelve" nomenclature...in the trailer, at least. (I didn't actually see the movie, which came out in 2009. Hard to believe it was that long ago.)



Of course, the same trailer also calls the Mayans the "world's oldest civilization." I guess we're not counting Mesopotamia, Egypt or China.

Say It With Me Now: 'Twenty Twelve'

Back in the early days of 2010, I endorsed the idea of referring to the year as "twenty ten" (rather than "two thousand ten") because it saved time.

But I didn't really practice what I preached. I found myself saying "two thousand..." more often than not in 2010 and 2011. And there are lots of other people hanging on to this mannerism, even though it results in more syllables and wasted productivity.

I think 2012 is going to be different.

I was speaking to a person in the TV business, and he said he was on board with the "twenty" approach for the first time. Why? Because "twenty twelve" rolls off the tongue.

It's alliterative. So finally the forces of poetry and economy are on the same side.

There's no resisting it, people.

Cities Visited: 2011 Edition

Five years ago, I began compiling an annual list of the cities I've visited. (Fellow blogger Anh-Minh gave me the idea, and she almost always has a much more impressive list than me.)

According to the rules, you have to stay overnight in a place for it to count and you can't include your current city of residence. You also only count each place once, even if you visit frequently.

Having two little ones has made it harder to travel, and so it's maybe not surprising that my list is shorter than ever this year.

At least that makes it easy to track.

Here's my list (in chronological order of when I visited):
1. Marietta, Ga.
2. Newnan, Ga.
3. Santa Cruz, Calif.
4. St. Helena, Calif.
5. Emerald Isle, N.C.

Not very impressive. I'm pretty sure even Ted Kaczynski traveled more than this.

"Happy New Year!"...at 7:47 p.m.

It will be a sad day when the kids can figure out it's not really midnight.