Worst Mother's Day Ever?

We have pretty low expectations for Mother's Day in this household. After all, THIS was the last one.

Even so, it's probably not a good sign that Kelly asked repeatedly today if she could abandon her family and start a new life.

During happier times

Some of the highlights:
—Elliot's repeated vomiting kept Kelly on the phone with the nurse until 2 a.m. last night.
—The little guy decided to kick off today with explosive diarrhea around 6 a.m.
—After Kelly asked for French toast this morning, I had to admit that I've never made French toast. Then I had to admit that I'd also never made pancakes. I inquired as to whether they're available in refrigerated-log form, so I could just cut a few off. Apparently they are not.
—We gave her a gift certificate for a massage. But due to a computer error, it was printed to look like a $5 off coupon. ("Did you give me a Groupon?")
—Alice decided today would be a fun day to start rejecting the bottle.
—We moved Elliot to our bed, and he threw up again.
—There are no pillows in our house that aren't soaked with vomit.
—Why don't they sell pancakes in log form? Seriously, people would buy it.
—Alice refuses to take a nap or eat or do anything but scream.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

Update: Kelly left the house several hours ago. I *think* she's coming back. If not, I don't have much time to learn how to breastfeed.